In today’s world, building close relationships with other people is becoming increasingly difficult. Some people have already begun to refuse rapprochement quite meaningfully.
Someone is afraid of a possible break, someone wants to maintain independence. And some simply do not understand why they need a close relationship with another person.
Psychologists have named six reasons that prevent you from building close relationships. What can cause fear – read below.
Fear of being misunderstood
Alas, many people are afraid to be open and expose their soul to other people because of the fear of being incomprehensible or offended. Such people convince themselves that they can cope with any pain and problems on their own.
It is very important for them that other people consider them stronger than they really are. And it is in personal relationships that they are afraid to appear weak and frightened.
Most often, this fear is triggered by a traumatic experience with an abuser or someone who brutally betrayed your trust. To get out of this program, you need to understand that not all people wish you harm. And many of them faced such problems.
There is nothing wrong or abnormal in seeking support and understanding from those who can share your pain.
Fear of feeling moral pain
A bad experience from the past can lead to the formation of a present complex. You will be afraid to feel negative emotions again and experience moral pain again. This is how the psychology of the victim is formed.
Psychologists believe that some rules will help to get out of this state and stop thinking all the time that you can be hurt.
First, you need to learn how to immediately tell people that you do not like their behavior and attitude towards you.
Secondly , understand that not all people around specifically want to hurt you. Each of us makes mistakes and can unconsciously become a cause for anger and disappointment for another person.
Thirdly , remember that in any relationship you have the right to keep your personal space protected from the whole world around you.
Fear of losing freedom
If you understand that you are consciously refusing intimate relationships with other people because of the fear of losing freedom, then this can be dealt with.
Understand that close people are not those who will in every possible way strive to limit your freedom and your rights. On the contrary, it is in normal close relationships that people strive to share all the joys, to enjoy spending time not only together, but also separately.
If you are afraid that your partner will claim your personal time and freedom, discuss this with him in advance. Offer to build boundaries in communication that both of you won’t break. And then you can create a harmonious and honest relationship.
Fear of responsibility
Unwillingness to take on additional obligations can become a serious obstacle to the development of relations. Psychologists say that this problem needs to be dealt with, since the fear of responsibility can quickly spread to other areas of life.
In romantic relationships, the fear of responsibility usually leads to serious conflicts and ruptures; in a career, to inhibition of development and lack of growth in positions.
To get rid of the fear of responsibility, you need to make a lot of effort. And to get rid of it, you need to find the root cause of such fear and work on problems. And with this, a specialist can usually help.
Inability to express one’s feelings and thoughts
A serious obstacle in communicating with other people can be the inability to express their thoughts and feelings, and share their opinions. Such people try not to participate in conversations, love solitude and rarely make contact themselves.
If you consider yourself boring and unworthy of someone else’s attention, then this will also hit your self-esteem hard.
Psychologists recommend that people who are faced with a similar problem learn to value themselves and praise themselves more often even for the most minimal achievements.
Understand that if you do not try to express your thoughts openly, without evaluating yourself from the position of another person, you will not be able to establish contact. And communication with other people is very important.
Feeling of one’s own uniqueness
Inflated self-esteem can also play a cruel joke on you. Such people think that others are simply unworthy of their attention. They are much more difficult to experience rejection by society and are afraid to be at the centre of a scandal.
If you have these symptoms, try to deeply and honestly analyze your actions and actions. This will help to understand that you can feel truly confident in yourself when you learn to adequately assess the forces.
If you are worried about some problem, then do not be ashamed to seek help from a psychologist. A sincere conversation with a specialist will help you regain your peace of mind and establish contact with others.